can you believe it i've been on-a-line for a whole year now!
i can't get over how much things have changed since then... and my blog has covered it all.
normally my tiny brain doesn't afford me a very long term long term memory, but now i can just go back and read my own past!
it's got it all... the end of the good old days at the tyrrell... up to my wandering canada invainly trying to find a dinosaurless land... to my daring smuggling myself into new zealand... up to my recent settling in and establishing myself here down under...
might as well take the time on this 1 year anniversary to wander down memory lane flashback style and look at the big events of this big transitional time...
man i was almost a totally different dinosaur back when i started my blog... i of course lived in my hometown of drumheller (the dinosaur capital of canada!) and worked at the dinosaur equivalent of disney world the royal tyrrell museum.
back in those naive days of mine i thought that nothing would ever change when it came to these big lifestyle details...
BLOG PREHISTORY
well okay this is before my blogging technically, but i have blogged about how craig stumbled across my preserved egg in the middle of the alberta badlands. also considering it was just my hatching day a month ago this was of course a BIG event that allowed my life to happen at all...
in the early days of my blog (but the end of the good old days) i told you of one of the more exciting aspects of my life at the tyrrell. that was getting to work with and hang out with actual palaeontologists.
however one of my last official tasks working for the tyrrell was accompanying dr. donald brinkman on a micro fossil hunt! man that was a real honour and treat!
MY DREAM GIRL
the last thing i tried to do while still a part of the tyrrell family was to try and act on my HUGE crush on lillian the albertosaur...
it of course didn't go anywhere near the way i'd hoped... after all why would a saurian goddess, huge tourist mega star, and all round hot female like her want to go out with a little runt of a t-rex like me?
this sadly played a bit of a part in the biggest event to EVER happen in my life...
BOULEVARD OF BROKEN DREAMS
of course the BIGGEST event to happen to me in the last year was my being fired/laid off from the royal tyrrell museum...
THE TOWN IDIOT
in the aftermath of the end of everything i'd ever known i decided i needed to get back in touch with what it is to be a dinosaur. so i embarked on a quest to find the 65th million block of BC (british columbia, canada).
on the way i discovered a WHOLE community of dinosaurs called dinotown. however being cut off from the outside world for eons, and populated by paranoid herbivores they won't let me live there...
BOND, PETER BOND
arriving in vancouver i had a realization... trying to build a whole new life is hard! why do it alone?
so i sought out and found the services of special talent agent peter bond... who has ever since saving my scales... well at least till lately...
MY PAST CAUGHT UP WITH ME
reaching my goal of 65 million BC i was pleasantly surprised to find a bunch of dinosaurs... unpleasantly i misunderstood what 65 million BC i was looking for... turns out i wanted 65 million years BC (little did i know canadian provinces don't all use metric time!) not 65 million BC the address. turned out these dinosaurs were just part of a travelling dinosaur exhibit...
also of an unpleasant was finding my cousin larry as the star attraction of the exhibit... me and larry don't exactly get along... what with his being a major JERK! and all...
YOU CAN NEVER GO HOME
failing to find a new home or place in BC i returned to drumheller in hopes that i could somehow pick up at the tyrrell where i'd left off...
funny how nothing i planned ever works out...
having discovered that due to the limited need or want for dinosaurs in human society, i decided i needed to relocate to a part of the world without any dinosaurs to help even out my odds.
so i sought out the help of craig's informational guru friend mike the librarian to try and research such a location on earth...
finding that the south island of new zealand has no indigenous dinosaurs and craig's heading over there for skool i might have smuggled myself over in his luggage without his knowledge or permission... but i say MIGHT have... for legal reasons i can't say much more on the subject...
arriving as an "alien species" (which is one of the stupidest things anyone's ever called me... i'm a dinosaur not an alien!) the government set out a number really hard criteria i had to meet by march 31st or i'd be deported...
THE SHOW MUST GO ON
in my efforts to meet the governments requirements i helped a dude named andrew put on a show for kids... it was a fun time!
WHERE THE TYRANNOSAUR ROAM
one of my major criteria for the government was a permanent place to live. having been unable to find anywhere i could afford (on a budget of $0) i got lucky finding the head gardener of the dunedin botanic garden ben. he was nice enough to let me move into the deep forest of the garden's upper dell.
SOMETHING ABOUT MUSEUMS
the last major component of my government criteria was a job. having had a bad bought of luck with every musuem or museum like institution since and including the tyrrell with such places as devil's coulee, the vancouver ecocentre, and vancouver aquarium i was thinking me and museums were a bad combination...
that is till i without ANY problems at all scored a nice easy job as a security guard at the otago museum...
AN ENDANGERED SPECIES
with my criteria met i became a legal extracontinental organism of new zealand. there are a lot of rules on my existence here, but at least i have a new home to start a new life for myself...
WORKING FOR THE WOMAN!
i have a cool new boss ms. rhonwyn. i want to get to know her a bit better, but thus far she's been away from the museum a lot... there also seems to some stuff worrying her about the safety of the museum.
recently i've also been given my own conservation program with the new zealand department of conservation. it includes these really cool signs all around the botanic garden...
sadly life hasn't all been fun and games here in new zealand. especially lately. i've had some very unusual problems pop up.
the most notable is the fact that the upper dell of the garden i'm living in is, according to legend, some sort of crazy maze of doom... people who enter it never return... i've been warned about it not just by ben the gardener, but also the department of conservation through agent hamilton!
making this maze all the more scary and undesirable to live by is the fact that recently it has been haunted by ghosts lights... they wander around at night, and if i listen carefully i think i hear them talking...
CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS?
my other major problem in new zealand is my first human enemy... the germ-man who has been nothing but mean to me for next to no reason...
1 comment:
I'm sorry to hear that Traumador. Well, good luck in New Zealand. I wonder who Ms. Ronwhyn really is. I have a feeling she's not giving you the whole story. Keep an eye out. Remember, don't trust anyone. Think about your actions before you make them. No one knows what the future holds.
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