movie review: walking with dinosaurs

though almost nothing but disaster and tragedy has come in the wake of my cousin larry visiting me, one good thing has emerged from the whole affair...

larry being the biggest dinosaurian actor in hollywood (in modern times anyway), has the behind the scenes scoop on nearly every high profile dinosaur movie of the modern era. as larry loves talking about himself and his various exploits, during his recent dropping by i've gotten the low down and behind the scenes gossip on pretty much every film larry has ever been a part of!

perhaps the most dear to his heart were the BBC prehistoric series including such legendary documentaries as walking with: dinosaurs, beasts, and monsters. the chased by dinosaur series, sea monsters, and prehistoric park all with nigel marvin.

larry giving me stories about these shows coinsides quite nicely with my birthday present from craig all of them on DVD. so i shall impart on you an very insiders view into the production of these shows. starting at the very beginning...

Walking with Dinosaurs

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Summary of Review

(Remember this is all from a Dinosaur point of view)

Score: 120%

Good Points:

the LARGEST cast of dinosaurs EVER in one project!

unmatched accuracy and attention to scientific detail for its time

authentic casting

easily among the best dinosaur, and prehistory portrayals of all time!

Bad Points:

some out of date dinosaur behaviour included (but this was cutting edge in its time. so i'm cutting scales here as it were)

i wasn't in it!

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Plot Summary

not much of a specific plot in human terms of a movie due to NO humans appearing in the movie at all! instead near perfect portrayals of dinosaur existence before their various extinctions millions of years ago.

in dinosaur terms of plot though these 6 episodes have it all.

romance. nearly every episode has a storyline or plot thread related to love. these vary from the heart warming (the love affair of the diplodicus), to the comedic (the out of date loner tyrannosaur story), to the very tragic (the ornithocheirus' epic). to all you dinosaurs reading this walking with dinosaurs is a great date movie!

epic. the saga of especially the coelophysis comes to mind as they muscle their way into a none dinosaurian world.

comedy. the antics of the leaellynasaura had me laughing the whole time. their such cute little buggers.

horror. the last episode is full of scary menaces to us dinosaurs leading up to the final extinction 65 million years ago (i highly discourage hatchlings from being allowed to watch this episode). From egg eating mammals, to volcanic gas traps, to large crocodiles, to the asteroid impact. a very scary note to end the series on.

action. okay too many great action sequences to list. to the guys out there, this film has so many scenes of hunting, stalking, pouncing, and ambushing it'd make even the most scavengeristic theropod yearn for the hunt...

Production History

for these particular films to be fully appreciated their behind the scenes story must be known first. so for this review i diverge with this new category (due to a few of my later review aspects being kinda sparse).

like SO much in modern dinosaur culture this series owes a great deal to jurassic park. with the majority of us surviving dinosaurs being dependant on public interest in us (due to our only occupations being in museums, theme parks, and oh so few lucky of us as movie stars) jurassic park brought a whole new level of public interest back to dinsoaurs.

at the forefront of this wave of public interest, was the flagship dinosaur of the jurassic park franchise (at least in the 1990's), my cousin larry. now whatever differences me and larry have in real life (caused by his being a JERK and all!) i can't bad mouth his actions in the 1990's (partially cause i hadn't been discovered or hatched yet) as larry put a lot back into the dinosaur community with his stardom.

larry has always been a staunch believer and proponent for dinosaur rights and cultural identity. militantly so in fact. it isn't exactly a tightly held secret that larry hates humans, and sees them as taking from us a world that we rightful owed millions of years ago.

though his politics may be a bit controversial inside and outside the dinosaur community one thing is for sure, they compelled larry to seek the making of a remarkably unique series. emerging from jurassic park and jurassic park the lost world a tried, tested, and true hollywood star larry decided to push for a side project he'd envisioned while working in mainstream hollywood.

that of an accurate and factual version of dinosaur existence be told. one where humans weren't injected in as the heroes. one where our heritage and past could be explored in a truly dinosaurian way...

larry found no one interested in north america, but when word of his aspirations hit britain film makers the BBC pounced on the opportunity. backed by both larry and the BBC the beginnings of history were in the making.

it is interesting to see how these human co producers would effect production. on the one side larry's extreme pro dinosaurian views shine through, yet some of the human sensitivities and misconceptions disrupt larry's vision.

the most public of these are the jurassic episode and larry's own finale episode. the human producers saw the late jurassic period as the Utopian dinosaur era, and as of such the episode has a rather loving and optimistic approach in it's story telling. this differed from larry's viewpoint (and mine) that the late cretaceous was the pinnacle of dinosaur existence.

larry's wishes were mostly kept for the finale (in which he starred) to be of a tragic nature, and a moving and swaying testament to the end of the dinosaurs reign of the earth. however the british producers were so keen to catch the hype from jurassic park they insisted on incorrect tyrannosaur social behaviour like that from JP2 (mostly the t-rexs being loners when we were in fact packing animals). i'll talk about this later, but i mention it early so you follow my small brains logic throughout...

the series before it had even started had one star, but in order to bring the prehistoric past back to life larry and the BBC were going to have to assemble a massive cast... which launches us perfectly for a look at...

Dinosaur Celebrities and Stars

with a staggering 21 dinosaur species in the cast, and 16 other very extinct animal types in this series it was show casing nearly a quarter the surviving prehistoric animals who still dwell the earth today!

by this point in the late 90's dinosaurs were getting used to being in the public eye, and more and more obscure and less main stream species were making their way into films and movies. what made walking with dinosaurs so unique was the prehistoric none-dinosaur creatures it featured. suddenly opportunities for fame and exposure were opened up to these otherwise unnoticed minorities (a trend the british have pushed up into the present with shows like primeval).

i list all the various cast members by episode rather then importance just due to the sheer number.

first episode "new blood" set in the early days of the triassic. larry wanted to tell the story this seldomly talked about era of dinosaurian history (at least in pop culture). it presents the then current reptilian rulers of the earth in some of their glory, but they are also depicted as grossly out matched by the dinosaurian new comers (true they were out matched on a geologic timeframe, but larry's dinosaurian supremacy over plays this to seem like a single year of time)


Placerias among the last of the mammal like reptile get a big spot light in this episode representing the old guard rulers of the earth.


Coelophysis a commonly overlooked by hollywood, but very important early theropods who finally as of walking got the public attention they rightfully deserved! in real life they were played on screen by all the members of the only modern surviving pack of coelophysis left today. they work at several museums throughout the world, and this was a rare chance for them to all work together. this family reunion aspect and their being able to act out their culture and past these guys apparently had a lot of fun while filming, and it shows in the quality of this episode.


cynodont are the token mammal infusion into this episode. as mammals would become important later on in geologic time it's good to see their origins on screen. at the same time one can't help but smell the humans at the BBC insisting that the cynodont storyline be an important one in this first episode.


Postosuchus this proto t-rex was a must for the pilot episode. a close ancestor of us dinosaurs postosuchus is viewed as distant family by us theropods even if he ate our primative ancestors. larry specifically wanted them included in the series. out of both respect for another archosaurian top predator, but for the more humbling role of being shown subcoming to dinosaur supermacy.


Peteinosaurus was more then thrilled at presenting flying reptiles in a NONE hollywood manner. typically pterosaurs are portrayed as nothing more then flying man killers, and the oppurtunity to set the record straight was a real treat for all the pterosaurs of the walking with dinosaurs series.


Plateosaurus were the giants of their time, but due to hollywood typically not doing dinosaur period pieces (and if they do they always get it wrong!) prosauropods are always over shadowed by true sauropods in movies. walking was just what the prosauropods needed to show the world what they had!


the second installment "time of the titans" is the only uplifting and happy episode. which makes for a refreshing watch. the other episodes tend to overly hint at or outright speak of the impending doom of the eras and environments their about. this episode is a power house of mega dinosaur appearances. never before in history has so many HUGE dinos been in one film...

Brachiosaurus having broke out into films with jurassic park the largest of dinosaurs makes a short appearance in time of the titans. however due to the attention the first brachiosaurus scene of jurassic park received in 93 (that interest peeking in a oscar nomination) the brachiosaurs bought into their own new popularity a bit too much. when JP2 entered production these sauropods made too high a salary demand, and were written out of the movie and gained something of a bad name for themselves in the movie making biz. their reputation was still damaged as of the late 90's, and the BBC not wanting to be too associated with them, but still needing them to appear in the episode about large american dinosaurs offered brachiosaurus this grand and quite complimentary appearance, but only for a minute. a jesture that eventually would lead to brachiosaurs being cast in JP3

Diplodocus being among the longest of sauropods is no stranger to film, but hadn't appeared in anything for decades till walking with dinosaurs. in time of the titans they are THE titan. the shots of the diplodocus herd on the move became instant classics, and are among the most iconic of this whole series.

Stegosaurus after enjoying their trimphant come back to movies in the post-jurassic park movie era with a prominent appearance in JP2 the stegosaurs were given a very short but high profile appearance in walking with dinosaurs. much like the brachiosaurs the stegosaurs are given very high notice part, but very little screen time. rumour has it that larry didn't get along so well with these martial artists of the jurassic while filming JP2, and thus manipulated the BBC to keep the stegosaur moments to a minimum.

Dryosaurus being a hypsilophodon were among dinosaurs that could almost never hope to appear in a movie. however being a numerous, but yet somewhat low key, member of mesozoic ecosystems walking with opened up a whole new oppurtunity for the whole hypsilophodontid family to appear. this would cummulate to episode 5 centering around some of Dryosaurus' relatives from down under.

Ornitholestes the small ancestor of tyrannosaurs and raptors, for their introduction to show biz, is given a key role as the nemisis of the baby diplodocus in the early parts of this episode. larry is known to get along very well with these primitive members of our ceolorasaur family, and insisted they be given a big part in the series.

Allosaurus is one of the few lucky dinosaurs to appear in two of these episodes. not only time of the titans, but also the aussie episode. allosaurs are of course NO stranger to the big screen, and as of such have a strong voice in hollywood. one that even matches larry's which was how they negotiated so much time on the series (this was also helped by their family's living so long throughout geologic time!).

Anurognathus the tiny sauropod cleaning pterosaurs were a requirement in this episode as per contractual demands by the sauropod stars. the sauropods required the BBC to provide the Anurognathuses to keep them comfortable. it was an interesting time where the actors offstage requirements could be included in the movie to enhance the film. it also wasn't hard for the participants in these scenes to perform as this was natural behaviour for all involved. the producers of the series were so impressed by the Anurognathus that they were cast again in a solo role (removed from sauropods making it a very unrealistic portrayal) in primeval this year.

the third installment "cruel sea" is among my most favourite mesezoic shows of ALL time! i've always had a soft spot for marine reptiles. dating back to my days living in the tyrrell museum. i used to feed the mariners on display every night before i'd goto bed. they were so majestic. former rulers of the blue. i always wanted to see them alive (rather than the tyrrell's being nothing more than bones). this episode is the first time in decades that marine reptiles have been done well...

Ammonite the shelled cephalopod (squid/octopus relatives) make a brief, but important cameo in this episode. sadly only one LIVING ammonite is seen on screen, and that's at a distance. larry informed me these guys are very hard to direct for filming (maybe explaining their brief but equally disappointing appearance in primeval). this made for not as great an appearance of ammonites as should have been warranted. ammonites were as common as fish during this period of time, and though the episode acknowledges their importance it sweeps them under the rug quickly.

Cryptoclidus though not the most spectacular of long necked plesiosaurs was a good representative of this family. despite popular depictions of plesiosaurs, most of them had medium lengthed necks like cryptos. these guys had immense fun filming with the underwater acrobatics and maneuvers of their heritage.

Eustreptospondylus the token dinosaur in the episode is the first high profile appearance of a megalosaur on screen. this is odd as megalosaurs are the longest known dinosaur by humans yet they've never appeared in film before walking with.

Hybodus the odd jurassic shark became a fan favourite with their anvil shaped fin. so popular and memorable they were asked to return in chased by dinosaurs sea monsters one of the few sea creatures to get a double appearance.

Liopleurodon the short necked pliosaur behemoth of nightmares made a very trimphant debut into showbiz with the intro scene of snatching a dinosaur off the beach (this was a very tricky scene to film as only one tiny bit of beach was deep enough for the liopo to duck behind the rock, and that barely permitted the room for it to grab the dino and lunge back into the water convincingly). among the largest predators of all geologic time was also asked to return for chased by dinos sea monsters.

Ophthalmosaurus the star of the episode is yet another first time appearance. this of the whole ichythosaur family. amazing to think that the fish lizards had never appeared in anything before, but it's true. probably the speed that they move at, even while going slow, proved prohibitive of old era filming technology. walking with remedied this fortuently.

Rhamphorhynchus were the only verteran actor prehistorians in this episodes cast, and served a real leadership role to the others on what to do.

the fourth epsiode marked the beginning of the creteaceous episodes (which made up half the series) "giant of the skies" is a tragic tale chronicling the demise of a single male Ornithocheirus. through the narrative of his finale journey we fly from one end of the prehistoric earth to the other, and get a very indepth view of dinosaurian life of the mid creteaceous.

Ornithocheirus among the largest of winged reptiles is the star of this episode. like so many of the other animals in the walking with series this was a first time appearance for these guys. on the behind the scenes side this was a surprise move made by larry who spurred pteranodon in favour of a less known pterosaur, which allowed the showing of the igaunadon era of time.

Iguanodon was the first really famous dinosaur in human culture ever, and played a big part in the really important early dinosaur fiction the lost world, but yet hadn't appeared in a film till this point (being brushed off in the 1925 film based on the book for newly discovered north american dinosaurs). however after appearing in walking they were immediately cast for the modern HBO remake of the lost world (in my opinion the best film adaptation of it by far!).

Utahraptor the giant dromaeosaur made famous due to it's discovery around the release of jurassic park actually hadn't been in anything up till this point. typically tyrannosaurs and dromaeosaurs don't get along, but larry and the utahs developed a real friendship while filming walking with. i figure this is because dromaeosaurs evolved from big lugs like utahs and got smaller and more annouying throughout geologic time. the bigger theropod the less annouying is the common contention of us tyrannosaurs!

Polacanthus despite being the first known ankylosaur a century and a half ago these guys had, you guessed it been in nothing... It was fitting that they got to walk along side other old timer igunadon in all their scenes.

Tapejara the debut of these huge crested pterosaurs was a real victory for the pterosaur community who'd been calling for more exposure in films than pteranodon or dimorphodon. larry sensitive to their request made sure this episode satisfied this demand.

Iberomesornis larry is proud of tyrannosaurs being a direct relative of birds (a status no other large theropod can claim. the carnosaurs and spinosaurs are distantly related to birds, but we t-rexs as the giant ceolorasaurs are directly linked) and wanted an appearance of an early bird species. due to the prehistoric geographic locations picked for walking with this episode was the first oppurtunity to show case such a primative speicies.

the close to home episode of the series "spirits of the ice forest" is set next door to new zealand in prehistoric austrilia which during this time was attached to us and antarcticia. this episode is about the extreme adaptability of us dinosaurs, and our overcoming extreme environments with extremeness! This episode is poplulated with the biazarre and novel survivors of geologic times past. Due to the sever nature of the polar environment a number of animals that had gone extinct elsewhere, but had adjusted to the colder climate, survived down under. as of such this episode features a very unique cast:

Koolasuchus the giant amphiban equivilant of a crocidile, surprisingly was not a new comer to film. in the old era movies at the earth's core and the people that time forgot both featured a koolasuchus. in this movie they were depictated as the water dwelling animals they were.

Leaellynasaura are the only hypsilophodon in history that will probably be the star of a dinosaur movie. Their funny and cute antics are very memorable, and lend well to exploring the strange south polar world of the cretaceous.

Muttaburrasaurus the rather large igunadontid are the true sterotypically aussies (their dinosaurian accents are even austrilian!) and give the episode that true down under flavour.

weta were once a wide spread species throughout the world, but now are extinct everywhere but new zealand! i'm going to have to find me one to see here in the present!

tuatara are a species of reptile that is inbetween lizards and snakes. in other words it is a common ancestor for most modern reptiles. virtually unchanged in 220 million years (but still a little different mind you!) these guys still again are around in isolated new zealand. again another something i have to find here!

finally the end of the series "death of a dynasty". the big end of cretaceous piece, and larry's most passionate performance ever (at least till prehistoric park). this episode captures my species past and heritage well. the only problems are the glaring mistakes of tyrannosaur behaviour, and it is a little different being that i'm an albertan t-rex not a montana one (same with larry for that matter).

Anatotitan the massive non decorated duckbill. very surprising that these guys or their ubber closely related relatives the albertan edmontosaur haven't been in films before. edmontosaurs are by far the most common dinosaur you find around drumheller. you'd think they'd come cheap for anything as a result!

Ankylosaurus the tankosaur, and t-rex nightmare (this episodes climax shows exactly why!) surprisingly had no roles previous to this. being one of the most iconic and popular of plant eating dinosaurs this is interesting. showing this popularity after this appearance the snap desecion was made to get these guys in JP3, even if it was a bumged up appearance it shows how these guys can easily sell themselves and dinosaurs in hollywood!

Deinosuchus the colossal crocidile makes a very short and unexciting debute with a very minor cameo. realizing their blunder some years later the BBC would rectify this by having the finale ep of prehistoric park centre around this large croc.

Didelphodon the token mammal of the episode. granted by this stage in geologic history mammals cropped up a lot, and the didelphodons were amongst the most common. you guessed it, and i'm getting tired of saying it, but i must. yet another new comer to hollywood...

Parksosaurus one can only think that the hypsilophodons had a very razor sharp agent. these otherwise completely ignored dinosaurian family (both in the popular eye and even scientifically almost) manage the most number of appearances at 3 out of 6 episodes. it helps that they were geologically successful, and present in a lot of prehistoric ecosystems, but man to get that conveyed ON SCREEN. i might have to get peter bond in touch with their agent, cause they sure got results!

Quetzalcoatlus a very brief but loving cameo for the largest flying animal of all time. quetzies are no stranger to the screen though getting the honour of killing the main character caveman in land that time forgot (mind you the quetzy there had to wear dentures for the role LOL).

Torosaurus beat out its close and much more popular relative triceratops for the role of lead ceratopsian. at the time touted as the largest skulled animal ever (now of course this title belongs to pentaceratops) it was hoped by the BBC this might gain some interest as torosaurs had never been on screen before. instead their rookie acting, and lack of majastey (compared to a triceratops anyways) left them sort of flat.

Tyrannosaurus nuff said

Dinilysia an early snake and mammal catcher makes an amuzing appearance as the target of tyrannoaur chick curiosity.

Dromaeosaurus the original raptor (in that it was found by humans first) finally get on screen, and earn themself stature and recognition towards (but not equaling) their cousins the velciraptors.

Triceratops the iconic and ultimate ceratopsian somehow yet again in the 90's is given an almost insulting role in a movie. in this case forced to play a mere carcasse right on the heels of JP1 where they were portrayed by a sick tranquilized individual (which is just a tad better than dead body in my opinion). the modern era just hasn't been kind to these guys. once they were acknowledged as the masters of the horned dinosaurs with epic roles such as 1 million years bc. it won't be up until last years (after massive protests and demands by the public) prehistoric park that triceratops finally got a modern appearance worthy of their stature of tyrannosaurs main prey item... er i mean rival.

Dinosaur Portrayal

walking with dinosaurs did nothing but good things for the public's understanding and appreciation for us saurians. not to mention their exposure to other prehistoric creatures never even hinted at before in popular culture.

even years later at the museum we were asked questions about our fossils and displays directly spurred by walking with.

perhaps where this series achieved the most was how it expanded on jurassic park's conveying dinosaurs as living breathing creatures. we saw everything from how some dinosaurs ate, to slept, to mated, and even how they died.

it showed that we didn't exist solely to inhabit isolated far away places simply to eat humans dumb enough to wander there. rather that we had been a very successful and thriving group of animals removed from humans, and totally undependant on them.

Impact on Dinosaur Perception

larry's goal of a series to inindate humanity with an accurate and realistic view of dinosaurian culture was truely realized.

not only did it succeed, but it was an international hit. spawning numerous sequels and spinoffs (which i have sitting in front of me waiting to be reviewed...).

Overall Score: 120%

clashes to go round... (the visitor part 12) (the pack part 2)

today has been something of a revelation. my cousin larry has finally told me his reason for visiting me unannounced. he has just offered me membership in a exclusive club of for only surviving coelurosaurs of today, called the pack of the primordial feather...

i was about to accept his offer when the most unexpected interruption cut in.

craig my legal guardian (who also kinda found my egg and hatched me) stood looking ready for trouble...

"it's been a while larry," craig stated. "i got lucky that you made the news everywhere here or i might have missed your visit."

larry's lips curled upward reviling the full length of his threatening fangs. deep from within his chest came a low rumbling roar (very similar to our primitive ancestors the crocidilians).

"you sound like you're not happy to see me larry," craig mocked. "well i can't say i'm to pleased to see you either larry, but there is one thing i can say for sure. you're not taking him larry. not over my dead body!"

oh man... why'd craig have to word it that way? cause there really wasn't much keeping larry from arranging a dead body...

craig seemed very content on a confrontation, but i couldn't for the life of me, or craig's see any reason for my guardian to be so confident around my 6 tonne relative...

larry leaned down. his teeth as exposed as he could physically get them. he was curling his lips so bad i thought they might start bleeding or tear.

"you have some nerve human," larry growled. "but if it is a corpse you need human, i may be able to oblige."

i grew nervous larry's body language was shifting to a very aggressive one. i knew craig could tell this (he's spent a great deal of time around us dinosaurs, and tyrannosaurids in particular). yet he didn't seem phased or even slightly scarred...

i had no idea what had changed. the last time i'd seen craig around adult tyrannosaurs (who weren't skeletons) was at a family reunion in canada in 2005...

craig had been nice enough to drive me to the reunion... (come to think of it i wonder. were all my family members there part of this pack?)... oh right sorry story at hand!

my relatives having told a few too many stories of past glories on the hunt started to get restless. that's when they realized i'd brought a human with me to the event...

next thing you knew zoe tyrannosaur insisted that larry had chased people wrong in jurassic park. to illustrate she took after craig like a giant reptilian cat on a poor tiny mammalian mouse (well okay mice are mammals, but you get my point)...

poor craig had no means of defending himself for the initial part of the chase. larry drunkenly ran after the chase taunting zoe how she wasn't doing much better than he had in JP. unlike his character in the movie zoe could see none moving objects and yet she couldn't catch craig.

had craig not locked himself in the campground office (with a very terrified camp staff) he'd probably have been a pre BBQ snack...

why this tale of 05. well craig was next to no different now in the year 2007 than he was back then. yet here he was deliberately making my cousin angry...

larry leaned closer. his intent would have been clear to anyone, that alone a trained dinosaur tender like craig.

craig in calm low voice clearly trying to keep me from hearing. "central knows i'm talking to you right now larry, and you know what will happen if i don't call them back."

who or what is central? why was larry supposed to be scared of it? how did my normally boring guardian craig know about it? but most important what was this central?!?

larry lunged forward upon hearing this cryptic response. my heart froze.

craig barely flinched. i'd never seen him like this before...

instead of chomping down on craig, larry let loose a great angry bellow right in craig's face. the angriest i've ever heard him. this made his roaring at the germ-man seem friendly.

apart from from some drool and the initial gust of air propelled at him direct from larry's lungs craig was unmoved. "about done larry?"

"i should have killed you when i had the chance," larry growled.

"if horses were wishes than we could have hyracotherium back," craig dismissed larry's menace. "in the meantime i'll be taking traumador, and you can get the hell out of town."

i was paralyzed by not only the epic tension, but more the confusion of were it came from. since when had larry and craig hated each other?

i could understand a little bit of dislike after the reunion chase in 05, but craig had told me on the drive home that "a tyrannosaur will be a tyrannosaur" as though he'd expected it when he drove me there in the first place...

the source of my confusion...

when i moved out of craig and dan's apartment, while packing i found an old discarded photograph in the basement (where i'd been living). i think craig had intended to throw the photo out, but the waste basket had been in the midst of the jungle that grew in the basement because of my poor cleaning of my room (just watch this video to see the apartment and the jungle). meaning the photo had never been properly thrown out...

it captured a moment of time when craig and larry appeared to be friends. they posed nicely together for the picture. more to the point on the back of the pic craig had written 'the end of the best field season ever of 2003'.

this photo in general has always been a intriguing mystery to me...

it was taken in the year 2003, the same year craig found and hatched my egg.

the photo clearly showed both craig and larry in the badlands, and not just any stretch of badlands. one i knew (sure there are a lot of them even in just alberta that alone the rest of the world). somehow i could tell it was a patch outside of huxley... close to where me and my mother were buried 65 million years ago.

the photo states it was the end of the field season. meaning that craig, and presumably larry were out in the field looking for fossils...

all these put together to form a very interesting story... craig and larry had set out into the badlands together, and found me!?!

this one scenario raised all manner of questions!

the most relevant to today's ordeal, how could it have been the best field season if they hated each other?

if they had been friends the scene playing out in front of me was proof they certainly weren't 4 years later.

"you dare order me around pest," larry roared.

"to be honest no. i guess i can't," craig conceded. "on the other hand, i can you on the other hand young man." craig pointed at me. "let's go traumador. we're leaving!"

"what?" i said in shock. i'd hoped they'd both calm down before bringing me into this. "i don't want to go right now."

next thing i knew i received an angry look from craig the like's of which i hadn't seen since i was a hatchling. "traumador! the! tyrannosaur!" oh no my full name... craig stormed over to me and took my by the collar.

next thing i knew craig was dragging me from the botanic garden . "hey stop. please. where are you taking me?" i protested. craig just relentlessly dragged me from the park.

larry just stormed off in the opposite direction clearly furious... great so now i had to deal with a really grumpy larry when i got back!

not that craig seemed any less grumpy right now.

he hauled me the whole 2 blocks to his home at salmond hall. right back up to his room. which i have to note was much cleaner since i was last crashing there...


"what gives?" i demanded once he'd let go of me.

"that was for your own protection," craig answered quickly glancing outside his window suspiciously...

"from who?" i challenged.

"your cousin," craig answered a little boggled. well okay i guess i could forgive him that. normally me and larry didn't get along. what with his being a JERK! and all...

"i was fine," i tried to assure craig, and made as though i was heading out the door.

"sit down right now young man," craig ordered.

"you can't just show up and boss me around," i countered. "i'm not a hatchling anymore. you said so yourself when you kicked me out of the apartment in drumheller!"

"than stop acting like one," craig snapped. "i've come to help you. so stop acting like i'm the one using you."

"and larry is?" i asked grumpily. craig had no right trying to pull the angry father thing on me. i was living on my own now, and had taken care of myself just fine this last year since being fired by the tyrrell museum.

"do i even have to answer that question?" craig was baffled. "larry shows up under the radar. crashes your place, makes you put your life on hold for him, and than starts manipulating your life. you're asking me if he's using you!"

"he is not," i feeibly reply.

"please traumdor it's all over the news what you two have been up to," craig calls me on my line of logic. "it doesn't take a brain the size of peanut to see he's trying to manipulate you. scarring the german half to death. somehow i'm just not seeing that as your idea. rampaging around dunedin and getting tyrannosaurs into the new zealand public's mind. again not something in your best interest traum."

"why would he do that?" i asked seriously unable to think of any reason. my rage at craig clouding my thinking. "why would he try and get us on the news?"

"to get you to join the pack," craig cut to the chase. "he's here trashing the hardwork you've done on your own all just so he can have another member in his wife's little club."

"he is not. he's just... wait how do you know the pack?" i requested.

craig's face lightened. "traum i've spent a lot more time in museum's around dinosaurs than you. i've heard things. besides you late cretaceous dinosaurs can't keep a secret even if it was going to kill you. the pack of the primordial feather likes to pretend it's existence is pretty hush hush, but if you know a thing or two, you catch wind of it."

"you've known about the pack this whole time, and you never told me about it?" i was shocked.

"i've done my best to keep you clear of it. i didn't raise you just to become another carnosaur," craig responded.

i was completely taken back. i took offense to almost every part of that sentence.

"you kept me clear of the one way i could fit in with my own kind?" i chocked out.
_
craig's eyes focused on me. "traum let's get one thing straight i'm not the one who banished you from dinosaur kind. larry is one of the principle culprits there. i wasn't the one withhold your membership on this coelurosaur club. larry was. he could have told you anytime."

"how am i the bad guy when they want you is to fill up the ranks of the pack you're better off without them."

i was getting mad at craig for some reason. i couldn't figure why at the time, but i think my tyrannosaur instincts had kicked in, and we get mad and aggresive when confronted. even with just mere information.

"well maybe as just 'another carnosaur' i'm better off in this pack," i mocked craig's earlier statement. "you don't even recognize the fact i'm a coelurosaur, and not a dumb old primitive carnosaur!"

"oh that's rich traumador," craig voice sharpened. "of course i know the difference. before you take the superior coelurosaur angle over the carnosaurs, take a long hard look at larry and the rest of your living relatives. carnosaurs may be brutes and thugs, but at least their honest about it! larry and the pack are subversive and deceptive. they've got their claws into all sorts of other people's and dinosaur's business. i respect carnosaurs more than most coelurosaurs."

"even me?" i snapped back.

"notice my use of the word most. of course i respect you," he replied.

"what kind of respect is it to walking in out of no where, and make my decisions for me?" i demanded.

"wait you were going to actually accept his invitation traumador?" craig responded shocked. "please tell me your just mad because no one ever told you the pack existed. you're not going to join are you?"

"i was," i proudly responded.

"traumador," craig slowly started to plead. "i raised you to be better than the pack. you can do so much more on your own. you don't need their help."

my angry boiled to the top. "who else is going to help me? you? and where do you get off saying that you raised me to be better than my own kind? what are you saying tyrannosaurs are inferior, and that i should be more like you dumb humans."

i could see craig's patience was wearing thin. "i never said any such thing about tyrannosaurs. if you want my honest opinion your cousin larry and the other members of the pack on the other hand are among the worst of surviving dinosaurs. not because their inferior, but because they think themselves better than the rest of the world."

"maybe we are?" i challenged. "what do you have over us. we existed for millions of years more than you. we were kings of all dinosaurs. the dinosaurs being the most successful land animals ever! and we were their kings!"

"oh so that's it is it?" his voice was now angered as well. "we're going to go by evolutionary and geologic success are we? well than mr. tyrannical king lizard both of us better get on our hands and knees. cause i have some news for you. we vertebrates have nothing on the invertebrates. come on let's see you get worshipping the cockroaches! come to think of it bacteria really should be the lord and master of your world than!"

"that's not what i mean," i angrily rebuttal. "you're just jealous because we tyrannosaurs are so much more than your pathetic mammal linage. that's why you raised me to fear and loath myself!"

these words appear to cut right through craig his voice dropped soft. "3 years of my life i gave up raising you. years i could have done other things, but no i decided. i'd rather use these years to bring you up better than other coelurosaurs. who just wander around bullying and intimidating everyone to get what they want. crushing everyone else's dreams so they can pretend their still in their prime."

"guess what traumador. as much as your cousin likes to pretend he's a big shot in the world he's not. none of you are! dinosaurs are extinct... and if you think you mean anything anymore outside of the museum community think again!"

"i tried to raise you to a sensitive and caring dinosaur so you could surpass your relatives, and maybe make a good name for tyrannosaurs and a place for yourself in that small museum world."

"back when you were at the tyrrell i was so proud of you. you exceeded my every expectation. you were loved by everyone at the musuem. sure you weren't the highest up the ladder, but if you had been the pack would have knocked you down anyway. just like they did to lillian ."

"so you tried to make me something i wasn't. something better, all because you thought my kind are monsters and jerks?!?" i screamed. "well thanks for the favour! look at me... thanks to your humanizing me i was kicked out of my home! forced to leave the whole country! and settle for being a mere security guard! and worst of all made a joke among dinosaur kind!"

"you're welcome," a tear erupted from craig's eye. "so this is what a 'true' tyrannosaur is then? i'd always wondered. were they all selfish rude brutes? i had hoped it was just the ones i'd met, and that in theory they were capable of much more deep inside. turns out i was wrong. maybe we are all just the sum of our parts, and tyrannosaurs are monsters and jerks."

"i hate you!" i shouted in response to that. how dare he call us monsters...

craig walked to the door and opened it. "well than mr. tyrannosaur since i've ruined your life so effectively, you can leave," his ordered. "we wouldn't want to keep you from paying your tribute to get in to the pack."

"trib-what?" i asked puzzled.

"oh that's rich," craig said flustered. "so you don't even know what you need to do to get into the club, and still i'm the bad guy..."

"on your way out maybe think about a few things traumador," craig's voice was the crossest i'd ever heard it. "ask yourself, what do you really know about the pack? if your cousin really have your best intentions in mind, like you keep telling me, why did larry lie to you about filming a movie in new zealand? most importantly ask yourself is it really 'humans' you're mad at or actually the coelurosaurs for treating you terribly? joining the pack isn't going to change who and what they are traumador. its only going to change you!"

"now go," he concluded.

part of me was eager to go, and end this conversation. at the same time in my head a sharp pain of guilt crept up as i started to think about craig's question.

craig was right. i knew next to nothing about the pack... it had almost all the world's surviving coelurosaurs as members. i did know of one instance it destroyed someone (lillian) for it's own purposes. other than that i didn't know anything. what was i going to have to give them to join? what did the pack do? what was i going to have to do within it?

"wait i just..." i started to ask hoping to reverse where this conversation had somehow gone.

"leave now!" craig cut me off. he's voice was heavy with emotion "i don't need to hear anymore about how much i destroyed your life thank you very much."

"no that's not what i meant," i stuttered as craig ushered me out of the room. "i'm confused. please i'm sorry."

"so am i traumador. i'm very sorry too, but i've heard about enough for today," many tears now ran down his face. "you think about who you are hard before answering larry."

"until you've made up your mind stay away from me!" he commanded. "you've made it very clear you don't want my help." with that the door slammed in my face.

everything behind my eyes went numb for what must have been hours...

what had i just done?

in the heat of the moment i'd said what i thought were perfectly rational points, but reviewing them in my head i realized just how hurtful they must have been. craig had said it himself. he'd raised me actively for 3 years. not because he had to, but because he wanted to, and i just bite him in the heart for it...

that was the most upset i'd ever seen him... i mean ever...

not only had he been there for me before he moved out of drumheller 2 years ago, but he'd tried to help me now. i had insulted him for it. more than that i'd turned on the one person in the world who had done nothing but support and help me when it counted most. all because of what? my big wig ruffian cousin who has been nothing but cruel and malicious to me my whole life. suddenly he shows up with an invite to a no humans allowed club, and my life before doesn't exist?

i am a monster! that has to be the only answer... am i wired inside so that even when surrounded and made to be good, i must decay back into a brute myself?

oh i could convince myself this is only biology at play. that instinctively i wish to be with my own kind, and part of a pack just like we've always done. i'd be lying to myself though.

suddenly the memory of the drive home from the family reunion of 2005 came back to me.

as we drove back toward drumheller i'd asked him worriedly, "aren't you mad at zoe and larry for chasing you?" thinking he'd never let me see my relatives again.

"no," craig responded very calmly. "a tyrannosaur will be a tyrannosaur." he finished turning to look at me. he's face saddened looking at me. i remember at the time wondering why he was so sad...

i'd never realized why until just now. he wasn't talking about zoe or larry being tyrannosaurs. he was terrified of my turning out like them...

upon this realization i let out a pained howl...

i may have destroyed things with craig far worse than the beginning of this year now, but i wasn't going to throw away everything he'd done for me.

he was right. i needed to think of who and what i was. i needed answers. i needed to know more about the pack. i needed to make things right...

larry was bound to try and pounce on this moment of volatility to force the issue of my joining, and also keep me from finding answers. i was going to need to distract him above all these other needs...

than something from our visit to my work at the otago museum occurred to me.

i had the perfect plan for keeping larry busy, and i knew exactly who i needed to hit up for information...

to be continued...

could it get any worse? (the visitor part 3)

well this week has thus far been a total disaster people of the web wide world. as of today i've been left wondering how can things get any worse?!?

my cousin larry's unannounced visit has nearly brought total disaster... out of all the people/dinosaurs who could have decided to visit me here in new zealand why'd it have to be larry?

he wouldn't say why though, and it's driving me a little crazy!

making matters worse i wasn't the first to find out about his arrival in town. my landlord ben the gardener came across larry first, and naturally wasn't too happy to discover a fully grown tyrannosaurus rex wandering his garden!

i was barely able to talk my way out of major trouble with ben, but 10 seconds after avoiding that barrel of monkeys i was shocked to see an even greater crisis unfold...

ben wasn't the only one who'd noticed larry (funny that... 40 foot long 20 foot high killer reptile/proto bird) in the garden. tons of locals saw him and frantically rang it into the authorities. it didn't take long for these complaints of a "roving tyrannosaurus rex" to come to the attention of my attache with the department of conservation. however when agent hamilton rushed to the garden to deal with the situation she thought it was me causing the problems...

i've heard a saying about making assumptions, but i can't remember it right now... cause man i'm starting to suspect larry planned his visit solely to destroy my new life in one fell swoop!

now from what little i know about my keeper from the department of conservation, agent hamilton, she'd never seen a dinosaur before me (as most people in new zealand. they've only got 7 known dinosaurs period, and ALL are from the northern island). i think she had done a little reading on t-rexs when coming up with my conservation program, but i don't think she ever realized that i was actually a true tyrannosaur.

what i mean is as i'm only 4 years old i still have a lot of growing to do (especially since i kinda got stuck on the growing factor at age 1... i'm way overdue for a growth spurt anytime now!). if you were to look at me, and not think about it you might not make the connection that i'm supposed to get up to larry's size...

well sadly agent hamilton had to make that realization in a more hands on fashion than she'd probably wanted too...

this was about the moment i reentered the story... having just dealt with ben's concerns about larry i turned to leave the garden's cafe only to discover agent hamilton outside frozen in bewilderment and terror...

with larry loaming right above her. now i know i've said this a million times people of the innerweb, but larry is a JERK! not only does he dislike humans, but he loves to scare them. especially ones he knows are important.

he could tell the agent hamilton was someone important, and more the point concerned with him (her staring in disbelief kinda gave her away). naturally as a colossal JERK! he had to make a point... one that was about to make my life WAY more difficult then ever before!



as larry leaned in closer to size up agent hamilton i felt my heart stop...

you see agent hamilton holds a great deal of power over my living in new zealand. after i completed a bunch of criteria for the government that allowed me to stay in the country i became the responsibility of DOC (that's the short version of the depart of conservation). as the only tyrannosaur (at the time anyway) of new zealand that made me an ubber endangered species, and new zealand takes protecting its wildlife seriously. so they assigned agent hamilton to my case...

the thing is agent hamilton hasn't been the warmest or friendliest of watchers, and i haven't had a chance to tell her much about my heritage or family... i was thinking i could ease her into my background as a tyrannical king lizard slowly... what with my being raised by humans has kind of dulled my saurian instincts. i thought this was a safe enough approach.

however seeing larry lean right at agent hamilton i knew that i was going to regret not mentioning it before...

especially since i knew the body posturing larry was using. he wasn't just checking hamilton out. he was about to declare his dominance...

i ran out of the cafe as fast as my tiny legs would take me (which considering i'm still built like a juvenile tyrannosaur is FAST! we're built like ornithimimids till we bulk up with age and growth) screaming in tyrannosaurese. "larry NOOOOOOO!"

i was too late though... larry paid no heed to my call. he let loose a full tyrannosaur 'welcome'. now i use the quotation marks because, though we t-rexs tend to greet each other with this bellow, it's not a nice greeting. unlike humans who try to get along right away; we tyrannosaurs are a little more confrontational. i guess it just shows the way times have changed.

65 million years ago you had to act big and pompous so that members of your pack took you seriously. sadly larry, and most of my relatives somehow haven't ever noticed that was then, and now millions of years later we'll never properly fit in with humans if we keep acting like the extinction event never happened.

now getting back to agent hamilton. a tyrannosaur greeting to a person (especially whose never seen a full grown t-rex before) can comes across as something between sheer terror and death itself.

i'm amazed agent hamilton didn't pass out. many others with more experience and knowledge have faired worse (most palaeontologists are known to have fainted during their first close encounter with a tyrannosaur)...

as a hardy civil servant agent hamilton was merely frozen in place gazing dumbfoundly where larry's eye had been... as larry himself just walked off.

i had finally managed to make my way to agent hamilton. "are you okay?" i reluctantly asked knowing the answer all to well.

the glare agent hamilton gave me told me everything i needed to know. had i been ice i'd have been boiled instantly...

agent hamilton hauled me off to the opposite side of the duck pond from the cafe, and larry. curious how both she and ben the gardener's first instinct is to talk to me as far out of larry's presence as they can... there is hope for them yet when it comes to dealing with t-rexs!

there wasn't a whole lot of hope for me though... agent hamilton was clearly NOT happy about larry's greeting...


"mr. tyrannosaur," she started in a very angry voice. the most emotion i've ever heard in her voice funny enough, but she paused for a second recomposing herself. it didn't fool me though. i knew she was furious. "i'm not sure where to begin..."


so i decided to take the initiative, and try and stop any more damage from being done. i was pretty sure that agent hamilton's complaints and concerns were going to similar to ben's.

after i finished telling her the few details i knew:

• this wasn't a random tyrannosaur, but my cousin


• i had no prior knowledge or warning of his coming


• larry was only here to visit me, and engage in no other activities


• he was here potentially filming a movie with peter jackson


• he'd only be here in dunedin a couple weeks

"are you aware of the situation this constitutes mr. tyrannosaur?" agent hamilton said digesting the story i'd just told her.

"an ordinary visit from a distant relative?" i hopefully ventured.

"i'm aware of your limited cranial capacity mr. tyrannosaur," agent hamilton acknowledged. suddenly she pointed to larry, and her voice reverted to it's previous dark tone. "but how can even you possibly try and rationalize this as a 'ordinary' visitor?"

i was stumped... technically i didn't think he was an ordinary visitor. that alone a welcome one... i wanted him to leave even more than everyone else. i surrendered to feeling sorry for myself. i'm not sure why i felt sorry though? i hadn't done anything wrong!

"mr. tyrannosaur i'm going to level with you," agent hamilton's voice cut through my sulking to my spine. she was dead serious. "when the department agreed to allow you to stay in new zealand we were under the understanding and impression that you would be the sole member of your species to do so. the fact i suddenly, less then 6 months later, now am faced with a secondary individual is something of an alarming development."

"further more when we agreed to allow you to stay we were under the impression that you were not in fact a proper tyrannosaurus rex, but rather merely a smaller member of the tyrannosaurid family. hence the official designation tyrannasaurus rex traumadorius on your file. now your telling me that not only are you directly related to this proper specimen, but that you are indeed an individual of the same species. thus meaning that one day i could very well receive more welcomes like this afternoon's!"

i could see where this is going... but i was at a loss for words. i'd used up all my crafty thinking with ben... "i haven't grown at all in two years," i sadly stated, knowing that was hardly a defence.

"i'm going to have to conifer with the department mr. tyrannosaur on your status," agent hamilton stated... oh no! the one sentence that could finish me here in dunedin...

now i can understand perfectly why agent hamilton, and pretty much everyone else in new zealand, would be upset with the prospect of a normal tyrannosaur living in their country. their mean and dangerous brutes, but i'm NOT a normal t-rex!

i've spent my whole life living with and working with humans. to show how well i get along with humans (at least compared to other dinosaurs) i'm the only theropod in the world who speaks english. added to that i'm not a huge carnivore. i'm not even medium sized. i'm smaller than a full grown human for crying out loud!

leave it to larry JERK! king of all jerks to just show up, and half an hour later completely destroy my life (again!).

i held next to no hope as agent hamilton got on her mobile and started briefing her people about the surprise situation she'd discovered at the garden. i glared as angrily at larry as i could across the duck pond, but he didn't see me. i wished that i could somehow make him disappear, or wait better yet never exist at all!


he hadn't noticed me starring, and for the first few seconds i didn't comprehend why... that is till suddenly it hit me... larry wasn't just randomly wandering by the duck pond. he was stalking!


it was as if he knew that i had a tiny thread of a chance of surviving his visit, and so he was going to cut that as fast as possible. because you see people of the web wide world larry pounced on a couple of hapless tourists!!!


all whilst agent hamilton was in furious debate with her colleges over the phone about my fate...

for the millionthed time this day my heart stopped as larry clamped down on the two tourists, and proceeded to swallow them whole. nearly a moment later agent hamilton in the middle of her heated and furious phone call happened to look up...

i knew exactly how she felt when larry bellowed in her face that moment, and i nearly collapsed unconscious...

by some miracle agent hamilton didn't happen to look over larry's way as he finished swallowing his victims... hopefully no one will notice their missing!

i kept my eyes on larry for the next several minutes hoping beyond hope that he'd filled himself. interrupting my vigil was agent hamilton having concluded her phone call.

"well mr. tyrannosaur, your cousin," she started in a strained manner. "it appears he entered the country through legitimate, and thus legal means. we have no immediate concerns as to his activities while in new zealand."

"this incident seems to have raised the need for further consideration on part of the department regarding your status," agent hamilton continued. she glowered at me from above her sunglasses. the first time i'd ever seen agent hamilton's eyes! "i will be visiting you next month for a thorough re-examination and assessment of your biologic and behavioural threat margin."

in other words i may have gotten barely off the hook this time, but next month agent hamilton was coming back to find any excuse she could to kick me out of the country...

"good day mr. tyrannosaur," she concluded, and stormed off... it was official. agent hamilton now hated me.

before i could could brood or think about the revelations of this new fact in my existence larry stomped over to me. "so cousin show me around this place."

not only was everything in shambles and disarray, but larry was still here. he'd still be here for my to entertain and put up with for two weeks.

which brings this blog post full circle... i have have incidentally figured out how it could get worse. larry has accomplished to bulldoze major parts of my life in dunedin quite successful in his first hour here.

let us see if i can save any of it in the next 14 days!?!

to be continued...